I went on vacation. It was much needed. Now I’m back. Yay…
Maybe you didn’t know, but I am quite the introvert. Vacation is much needed when you are introverted, especially when your jobs primary function is interacting with a lot of people.
Let me take a step back for a second.
Firstly, maybe you don’t care … Maybe you don’t know who I am so knowing whether or not I am introverted isn’t really a concern for you. That’s cool, and if you don’t know me, it may be important for you to understand that this is a feeble attempt at humor. I have a weird sense of humor…
Anywho
Secondly, if you made it past the last paragraph then I guess I can assume that you care… So here’s the thing… I am a pastor and I literally get paid to speak weekly in front of group of people. Sometimes I speak in front of a lot of people, other times not as many. For whatever reason, my introversion doesn’t seem to rear its ugly head when it comes to things like sermons. It manifested in ways like this: I would rather be at home by 6 pm every night. I don’t like going to parties. I live in a small town because big cities annoy me.
I like the woods, I like camping, hiking, solitude…
So writing a story about my life, for anyone to read gives me pause…
Time for reflection and an overview of this whole book thing
If you didn’t already know I wrote a book. Its what this whole website thing is named after. The entire title is “The Millennial pastor: That one time they gave me a church at 28 years old … I can’t even…
#Blessed #JesusSaves #SorryNotSorry #HashtagAreSoDumb”
Yes, it is a ridiculous title, it’s long and unnecessary, but I wrote it (hashtags and all), and yes…it is a real-life book. It’s not a “pdf on your computer or something” sort of a book as one of my close friends so eloquently put it. It’s a real “I have an actual publisher” sort of a thing. You will be able to buy it on Amazon, there will be Kindle and iBooks versions as well.
So yes, I wrote a book, but I’m not really sure I would consider myself an author.
See, my publishers want me to market myself, to pay for a publicist, to go and speak at bookstores and sign copies of a book that may not sell more than ten copies. All of that honestly sounds terrible. They are also the ones that want me to blog regularly about… well me… and the book I guess.
This is not my favorite…
So the dilemma I have is this… I am an introvert and I wrote a book that, despite my personal reservations, I would like people to read. I would like people to read my story because it’s not just my story. Its the story of how God is still active in the church. How God can use anyone to do anything. How God could take a millennial, someone who doesn’t really like the church and put them in charge of one. In spite of shortcomings and inexperience, God equipped and enabled this church to continue to do the work of building the kingdom of God.
That’s why I want people to read this story. That’s why I think it’s worth sharing. Still, the dilemma remains… I have found that I am nearly incapable of “selling” or “marketing” myself and this book. I was told I should plan a book launch party to kick off when publishing is finished, but I’m not going to do that. I was told that I should cold call bookstores and try to negotiate having them stock my book, even offer to do a signing, but that honestly sounds like torture to me. I was even questioned about how interested I would be in doing a book tour… my response?
“Not so much”
This blogging “thing” is about the extent of what I feel comfortable or even capable of doing. So, I have resigned to believe that if God wants this story told, people will read it. If it’s supposed to happen, it’ll happen .. Maybe, but hopefully not, it will happen because God calls me to do uncomfortable things like do a book reading at Barnes and noble, or speak at a convention about my story.
This is my dilemma…
I am a private person, but God did a thing and I was a part of it, and it would seem He wants the story told.
Marketing seems selfish, self-promotion seems prideful, but what am I to do? Am I making a bigger deal of this than it really is? Does my dilemma make sense?
I’m kind of at a loss and I just signed off on the manuscript and the cover will soon follow for my approval. We might actually, finally… be days away from this thing going to print.
Let me know your thoughts peeps… thanks
Until next time…
Peace Out!
#Blessed
P.S. – Thats the Cover up there…
It’s clear that you feel this is God’s story, rather than, not so much your own. While it is your own and are probably proud of yourself making this accomplishment of writing and actually still lead pastor at your church and making it work, it seems that you attribute these successes to God. He’s called you and put this passion there and given the abilities, because even stated here in this blog you in every way are the unsuspecting hero. You are weak, but He is strong. You have chosen to be an obedient player in the story, but ultimately this is God’s story. You are marketing an amazing thing God has done, so don’t be afraid to market your story.
Also, if you feel guilty for proceeds consider donating a portion or proceeds after a certain point and you can make that known if you desire.
For the record, I’d feel like a deer in headlights if someone told me to do those things too. But God has done surprising, empowering things so far in our lives, so don’t forget that, even in the face of these seemingly rediculous, potentially selfish things. I do think God can make amazing things happen, but I also feel like your book would be invisible among the millions of titles out there, even if it has a cool cover.
Hey Melissa, Thanks so much for the thoughtful comment. I will most certainly take your suggestions to heart and do my best to make sure none of this process focuses solely on myself.
I thing as long as I stay transparent about the entire process I should hopefully steer clear of any selfish impulses.
Thanks!